20 Songs About Being Scared to Love Someone

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Written By Julia Mehalko

Julia is a music journalist with a passion for retro songs. She holds a degree in journalism from University of Nevada.

Love can be a beautiful and exciting thing. However, it can also be terrifying. Even the most confident people can find themselves feeling scared to fall in love. Whether it’s from the fear of completely trusting someone, the fear of potentially having your heart broken, or something else entirely, love can be absolutely terrifying.

Thankfully, we have music to help calm our worries. These 20 songs below all deal with being scared to love someone! Told from different perspectives and in different genres, this complete playlist of songs is sure to help comfort you as you deal with your own worries about love!

1. “Because of You” by Kelly Clarkson

“Because of You” by Kelly Clarkson, released in 2005 on Clarkson’s album Breakaway, is one of the best — and saddest — songs about being scared of love. In this hit song, Clarkson sings to an ex who has treated her poorly. Now, as a result of his treatment, she feels damaged and scared to love again.

She sings the lyrics, “Because of you / I find it hard to trust not only me but everyone around me / Because of you, I am afraid.”

Clarkson initially wrote this song when she was a teenager and suffering from her parent’s divorce. However, so many listeners around the world have turned to this excellent track when going through their own romantic issues!

2. “The Fighter” by Keith Urban featuring Carrie Underwood

Keith Urban and Carrie Underwood’s duet “The Fighter” opens with the lines, “I know he hurt you / Made you scared of love, too scared to love.” As the song progresses, Urban and Underwood sing to each other.

Underwood says she doesn’t feel ready for a relationship, as her ex broke her heart. Urban understands this and sings that he won’t hurt her — and he won’t let anyone else hurt her, either. This country duet is a great song about not being ready for a relationship — until you realize you are!

3. “Quicksand” by SZA

“Quicksand” by SZA explores wanting to fall in love with someone, yet feeling that you can’t. In this R&B song, SZA explains that she likes the person she’s with — even though they aren’t in an exclusive relationship and she knows that he’s likely seeing other girls. While this hurts her, she can’t help her feelings for him.

But this doesn’t mean she’s ready to fully love him. No, she can’t do that, as she’s scared too! She explains this by singing, “Darling, you make it too hard to trust / You keep running from me / I’m scared of love.”

4. “The Witness Trees” by Stone Sour

In “The Witness Trees” by Stone Sour, the rock band sings about feeling scared of both love and life. The singer expresses his fear and his thoughts of being lost. He doesn’t quite know who he is or what he should do.

He also sings about his romantic relationship, one that’s clearly struggling, especially because it seems that he struggles with not being scared of love. As a result, he sings, “I don’t know what you need / I’m scared of love, I’m scared of what it means to me / This empty house is burning down around me.”

5. “Jump” by XTC

“Jump” by XTC opens with the lyrics, “Scared of love, love and swimming pools / Falling in, you said, was for fools.”

In this song, XTC sings about someone who says they’re scared of love. They sing to this person, telling them that they shouldn’t be so scared to love someone. While it is always scary to find a new relationship, they sing that people will regret it in the long run if they don’t seek out romance.

6. “Damaged” by Danity Kane

Danity Kane’s hit 2008 song “Damaged” follows the group as they sing about their damaged heart. However, even though their heart is damaged, they still feel as if they’re falling for someone new — and this scares them.

After all, they’re not quite sure that they can fully love again, as the person they were with previously broke their heart. Therefore, they question this new person in their life, wondering if they can help fix them!

7. “Damaged by Love” by Tom Petty

“Damaged by Love” by Tom Petty discusses being too damaged to love. In this song, Petty sings about a woman and her life. Even though she goes about her day and lives out her life, he knows her past — and knows that she has been hurt before.

Thus, he sings that she’s, “So young, and damaged by love.”

8. “How Long” by Lionel Richie

Lionel Richie’s 2000 song “How Long” explores the feelings of not wanting to hurt someone. Richie sings about how much he wants to be with a woman. However, this woman continues to put him off and makeup excuses about why they cannot be together.

She’s been hurt in the past, and this has made her scared of love. So, in a way, she’s trying to protect both her and Richie by denying their romance from ever happening.

Richie sings about this and says, “I know all about the hurt and the problems in the past / I know why you’re scared of love / ‘Cause you think it just won’t last long.”

9. “Don’t Talk About It” by Tove Lo

“Don’t Talk About It” by Tove Lo follows a group of young people who have wealth and fame. However, they also have a lot of insecurities and issues that they easily sweep under the rug. Instead, they try to focus on the beautiful world — but through partying, drugs, and more.

At the beginning of the song, Tove Lo sings about how so many in this group are scared to love. She sings, “Young and scared of love affairs, so keep your conscience down.”

10. “Terrified” by Terror Jr

In “Terrified”, Terror Jr explores feelings of deep terror and insecurities at every loving again. The singer says that she’s been hurt before. She knows that romance isn’t what the movies and books seem to say that it is.

As a result, she’s incredibly scared of ever falling in love. She sings the lyrics, “I’m not afraid of love, I’m terrified / It never feels like how they advertise.”

11. “Bound to You” by Christina Aguilera

“Bound to You” by Christina Aguilera, which appears on the movie soundtrack for Burlesque, follows the singer as she realizes that she’s falling in love with someone. She sings about how someone hurt her in the past, and this has resulted in her building walls around her heart.

However, now she realizes that she can love again — but this doesn’t make her fear go away. No, she’s more terrified of falling in love than ever!

Throughout the song, she struggles with this fear while also always explaining that she loves this man. She sings, “I embrace my fears / All that I have been carrying all these years / Do I risk it all? / Come this far just to fall.”

12. “Black Diamonds” by Big Thief

“Black Diamonds” by Big Thief explores getting into a relationship, yet wondering just what the relationship is. The singer expresses worries about the relationship, hinting that both she and her partner struggle with expressing their feelings. In a way, they both feel scared of love.

She sings about her partner, saying she feels, “Terrified of what your love’s revealing.”

13. “Would’ve, Could’ve, Should’ve” by Taylor Swift

“Would’ve, Could’ve, Should’ve” by Taylor Swift, which appears on her 2022 album Midnights (3 am Edition), follows the singer as she reflects on a past relationship. Her ex completely broke her heart and treated her terribly. As a result, she now feels haunted by him — and feels scared to love again.

She also wishes that they never would’ve met. However, she cannot change the past. Now, no matter how hard she tries, this ex haunts her.

14. “Wake Up” by AWOLNATION

AWOLNATION’s 2011 song “Wake Up” explores many feelings toward love and life. The singer feels lost as he tries to sing to another, likely his romantic partner. However, he feels confused and admits that he also feels scared to love.

15. “Go” by The Smashing Pumpkins

“Go” by The Smashing Pumpkins, first released in 2000, discusses many emotions that come with falling in love — and falling out of love. The song deals with heartbreak and becoming scared to love as a result.

The singer explains that one person made him scared of love, even though the song does suggest that we always should experience love. As a result, the song deals with the many complicated emotions that come with romantic relationships.

16. “I Feel It Coming” by The Weeknd featuring Daft Punk

The Weeknd and Daft Punk’s “I Feel It Coming” follows the singer as he realizes that he wants more from the romantic relationship he’s in. However, his partner feels scared to love again. The Weeknd knows about her fear and her heartbreak in the past.

However, he tells her that he will treat her right. Because he knows that she feels scared, he wants to ensure that she knows she can trust him!

17. “Surefire” by John Legend

In “Surefire”, John Legend sings about a relationship that he wants to last. He admits that they both need to work on things. After all, he says that they both feel scared of love! But he doesn’t want to lose this woman and instead realizes that this relationship will last!

18. “Heart Attack” by Demi Lovato

“Heart Attack” by Demi Lovato follows the singer as she admits that they feel scared to fall in love. The song opens with the lines, “Puttin’ my defenses up / ‘Cause I don’t wanna fall in love / If I ever did that, I think I’d have a heart attack.”

Lovato goes on to talk more about these fears. They express their worries about falling in love, especially because they found someone they truly like. But it doesn’t matter, as they still won’t let their defenses down!

19. “I Love You” by Billie Eilish

Billie Eilish’s 2019 song “I Love You” explores a complicated romantic relationship. Eilish sings about this relationship and how much she loves the person she’s with — even though she doesn’t want to. When this person tells her that they love her, she grows scared.

However, she knows that she loves this person back, too. Eilish likely has many reasons as to why she feels scared of loving this person who clearly loves her back. For example, she could feel scared to lose someone — specifically her partner.

She sings at the end of the song, “I can’t escape the way I love you / I don’t want to, but I love you.”

20. “Don’t Be Scared” by Yoko Ono featuring John Lennon

Finally, let’s talk about the last song on our list! “Don’t Be Scared” by Yoko Ono, featuring John Lennon, discusses how we all shouldn’t feel scared to love. The duo explains that it feels so much better to truly love someone rather than to hide away and refuse love.

They also sing that we should all try not to feel shy about love. Instead, we should seek it out and not feel so frightened of it!